PREPARE: Preparing for your Successful Marriage
You will find thought-provoking materials to help you gain greater clarity about what you want from life and from marriage, from choosing your priorities in a mate, to dealing with emotional baggage, to addressing sensitive issues like physical or mental illness.
I feel attraction to my own gender, can I get married?
If someone has already indulged their same-sex interest even to a moderate degree, then this is by no means a simple matter. Marriage should not be pursued without professional assistance to figure things out.
I did things in the past that I am now ashamed of; the guilt is eating me up.
Guilt is a healthy response as a reaction to the past, yet it is a dysfunctional response to our posture for the future. If you have done things you should be ashamed of, not feeling guilt would be a bad thing. But if the guilt is undermining your confidence in your ability to move forward in your life, it is a really bad thing.
I am painfully quiet and find dating worrying and challenging.
Dating can leave some people feeling nervous, anxious, and worried. This impedes the dating process and makes it harder for both parties. The good news is that it is much less frightening than it seems.
I am attracted to smart people, is that a problem?
Many people find something exhilarating about dating someone particularly smart. They find it easier to respect the person and take them seriously. They find the conversation is more stimulating and engaging. Where it gets complicated is when people also want – or more likely need – other features in their spouse which do not necessarily go hand-in-glove with intellectual brilliance.
How to be more interesting.
When you have an interesting life, you will have so much more to speak about, and you’ll come across as an interesting person. Your dates will be more engaging and meaningful.
How addiction to pornography could be affecting your dating.
Needless to say, this is a highly sensitive topic. We discuss how dating and pursuit of marriage is likely being impeded by an addiction to porn. The purpose here is to look at the ways that it complicates a person’s path towards forming a healthy relationship.
Finding out about a medical condition
If you are told that a potential shidduch has a medical condition, it is reasonable for you to be apprehensive. Health is a very important issue, but it is only one of many important issues. Take the time to understand the facts of the matter, which often show things in a different light. And remember to consider the whole person, and not reduce them to their area of difficulty.
Does family really matter when it comes to a shidduch?
You may marry “into” a family, but you are not marrying “the” family. People should be assessed on their own merit. At the same time, it is important to know what to try to understand about the family’s role on the person themselves. What type of parenting or family life did they have? How have they dealt with adversity in their upbringing? And, how important is a close connection to your spouse’s family?
Do I need therapy?
While therapy is designed to deal with traumas and wounds from the past, coaching is focused on helping someone figure out what to do going forward. If you feel stuck in your dating, you might benefit from working with a coach. If you are struggling with a significant issue, you will benefit from working with a therapist.
Coping with disappointment in dating: The Rollercoaster syndrome.
A girls meets a guy and is super excited about his date. This excitement remains at implausible levels for a few dates… until cracks appear in the image of perfection.
I feel attraction to my own gender, can I get married?
If someone has already indulged their same-sex interest even to a moderate degree, then this
I did things in the past that I am now ashamed of; the guilt is eating me up.
Guilt is a healthy response as a reaction to the past, yet it is a
I am painfully quiet and find dating worrying and challenging.
Dating can leave some people feeling nervous, anxious, and worried. This impedes the dating process and
I am attracted to smart people, is that a problem?
Many people find something exhilarating about dating someone particularly smart. They find it easier to
How to be more interesting.
When you have an interesting life, you will have so much more to speak about,
How addiction to pornography could be affecting your dating.
Needless to say, this is a highly sensitive topic. We discuss how dating and pursuit
Finding out about a medical condition
If you are told that a potential shidduch has a medical condition, it is reasonable
Does family really matter when it comes to a shidduch?
You may marry “into” a family, but you are not marrying “the” family. People should
Do I need therapy?
While therapy is designed to deal with traumas and wounds from the past, coaching is
Coping with disappointment in dating: The Rollercoaster syndrome.
A girls meets a guy and is super excited about his date. This excitement remains
I feel attraction to my own gender, can I get married?
If someone has already indulged their same-sex interest even to a moderate degree, then this is by no means a simple matter. Marriage should not be pursued without professional assistance to figure things out.
I did things in the past that I am now ashamed of; the guilt is eating me up.
Guilt is a healthy response as a reaction to the past, yet it is a dysfunctional response to our posture for the future. If you have done things you should be ashamed of, not feeling guilt would be a bad thing. But if the guilt is undermining your confidence in your ability to move forward in your life, it is a really bad thing.
I am painfully quiet and find dating worrying and challenging.
Dating can leave some people feeling nervous, anxious, and worried. This impedes the dating process and makes it harder for both parties. The good news is that it is much less frightening than it seems.
I am attracted to smart people, is that a problem?
Many people find something exhilarating about dating someone particularly smart. They find it easier to respect the person and take them seriously. They find the conversation is more stimulating and engaging. Where it gets complicated is when people also want – or more likely need – other features in their spouse which do not necessarily go hand-in-glove with intellectual brilliance.
How to be more interesting.
When you have an interesting life, you will have so much more to speak about, and you’ll come across as an interesting person. Your dates will be more engaging and meaningful.
How addiction to pornography could be affecting your dating.
Needless to say, this is a highly sensitive topic. We discuss how dating and pursuit of marriage is likely being impeded by an addiction to porn. The purpose here is to look at the ways that it complicates a person’s path towards forming a healthy relationship.
Finding out about a medical condition
If you are told that a potential shidduch has a medical condition, it is reasonable for you to be apprehensive. Health is a very important issue, but it is only one of many important issues. Take the time to understand the facts of the matter, which often show things in a different light. And remember to consider the whole person, and not reduce them to their area of difficulty.
Does family really matter when it comes to a shidduch?
You may marry “into” a family, but you are not marrying “the” family. People should be assessed on their own merit. At the same time, it is important to know what to try to understand about the family’s role on the person themselves. What type of parenting or family life did they have? How have they dealt with adversity in their upbringing? And, how important is a close connection to your spouse’s family?
Do I need therapy?
While therapy is designed to deal with traumas and wounds from the past, coaching is focused on helping someone figure out what to do going forward. If you feel stuck in your dating, you might benefit from working with a coach. If you are struggling with a significant issue, you will benefit from working with a therapist.
Coping with disappointment in dating: The Rollercoaster syndrome.
A girls meets a guy and is super excited about his date. This excitement remains at implausible levels for a few dates… until cracks appear in the image of perfection.
I feel attraction to my own gender, can I get married?
If someone has already indulged their same-sex interest even to a moderate degree, then this
I did things in the past that I am now ashamed of; the guilt is eating me up.
Guilt is a healthy response as a reaction to the past, yet it is a
I am painfully quiet and find dating worrying and challenging.
Dating can leave some people feeling nervous, anxious, and worried. This impedes the dating process and
I am attracted to smart people, is that a problem?
Many people find something exhilarating about dating someone particularly smart. They find it easier to
How to be more interesting.
When you have an interesting life, you will have so much more to speak about,
How addiction to pornography could be affecting your dating.
Needless to say, this is a highly sensitive topic. We discuss how dating and pursuit
Finding out about a medical condition
If you are told that a potential shidduch has a medical condition, it is reasonable
Does family really matter when it comes to a shidduch?
You may marry “into” a family, but you are not marrying “the” family. People should
Do I need therapy?
While therapy is designed to deal with traumas and wounds from the past, coaching is
Coping with disappointment in dating: The Rollercoaster syndrome.
A girls meets a guy and is super excited about his date. This excitement remains
I feel attraction to my own gender, can I get married?
If someone is asking this question, they are quite obviously facing a massive dilemma. We are addressing someone who assumes and plans to get married but who is questioning themselves. One possible element of the
I am painfully quiet and find dating worrying and challenging.
Dating can leave some people feeling nervous, anxious, and worried. Remember that opening up to someone relatively quickly is not something we have to do in any other situation, so it is not surprising if
I am attracted to smart people, is that a problem?
Many people find something exhilarating about dating someone particularly smart. They find it easier to respect the person and take them seriously. They find the conversation is more stimulating and engaging. Where it gets complicated
How addiction to pornography could be affecting your dating.
Clearly, there are halachic, spiritual and psychological issues with pornography. Here we are looking at ‘addiction’ to porn, which means that the person feels a degree of compulsion. An addiction will interfere with your normal
First deal with your psychological problems.
Marriage is the solution for many things, but it is not the solution to psychological problems. If you come to a relationship with psychological problems, there is a significant probability that they will only get
Does family really matter when it comes to a shidduch?
Put very simply, family matters a lot, but not as much as some other things. It is true that family is an important aspect of marriage and life. But ultimately, you are contemplating marrying an
Do you have trouble controlling your anger?
You don’t have to be perfect to be married, but some behaviors are particularly damaging and should be addressed and brought under control before entering into a marriage. Anger, or more accurately rage, is one
Do I need therapy?
You are single and have been trying to get married for a while. Things are not going so well. You have dated a decent number of people, and not only have you not met ultimate
Conflicting and confused priorities.
Without realizing it, some people are actually looking for opposites in a single person – which may explain why things are not going so well. It is not impossible for those differing traits to exist
Best not to date if you are unable to give it the time and focus it deserves.
For a date to go well, you need to be present and focused. If you are over-tired, exhausted, or distracted, the dating can fall flat. If possible, it is best to begin dating when you
I feel attraction to my own gender, can I get married?
If someone is asking this question, they are quite obviously facing a massive dilemma. We
I am painfully quiet and find dating worrying and challenging.
Dating can leave some people feeling nervous, anxious, and worried. Remember that opening up to
I am attracted to smart people, is that a problem?
Many people find something exhilarating about dating someone particularly smart. They find it easier to
How addiction to pornography could be affecting your dating.
Clearly, there are halachic, spiritual and psychological issues with pornography. Here we are looking at
First deal with your psychological problems.
Marriage is the solution for many things, but it is not the solution to psychological
Does family really matter when it comes to a shidduch?
Put very simply, family matters a lot, but not as much as some other things.
Do you have trouble controlling your anger?
You don’t have to be perfect to be married, but some behaviors are particularly damaging
Do I need therapy?
You are single and have been trying to get married for a while. Things are
Conflicting and confused priorities.
Without realizing it, some people are actually looking for opposites in a single person –
Best not to date if you are unable to give it the time and focus it deserves.
For a date to go well, you need to be present and focused. If you
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