Bond
Deepening the relationship
The second, and typically longest, phase of dating is about deepening the connection, creating the opportunity for the relationship to develop.
In this “Bond” section, you will find lots of ideas and questions to help you develop the connection, as well as materials on how you can tell whether the person you are dating is likely to be your suitable spouse and life-partner.
We address a multitude of topics, from what to do if something is bothering you about your date, whether you are settling for second best, what to do if you are not developing emotional feelings – and so much more.
Should They Continue or Should They Quit?
September 30, 2022
No Comments
When after a few good dates, one or both parties feel that it is not going anywhere, the question arises whether to keep going or quit. It is important to recognize that there is, in reality, a third option: helping those dating to become unstuck?
Often there is an entirely comprehensible reason why things are stuck, and in most such cases it is possible to get around the issue. Most of the issues can be overcome through a basic level of self-awareness combined with acquiring some modest new dating or relationship building skills. We would help many people if we offer daters access to timely input.
“I’m Not Feeling It”: How to build Connection
September 21, 2022
No Comments
One of the key reasons people struggle with dating is: bonding, or building a connection. If connection doesn’t develop automatically and organically, it is still possible and necessary to nurture it. How? By saying and doing those things that trigger the same kinds of reactions that for most people happen naturally. Make it your business to ensure that your date feels better about herself for having spent some time in your company. This is especially true for people who are struggling to build connection.
“I’m Not Feeling It”: How to build Connection
September 20, 2022
No Comments
One of the key reasons people struggle with dating is: bonding, or building a connection. If connection doesn’t develop automatically and organically, it is still
How being bullied affects dating.
July 7, 2022
No Comments
More than the exact differences of your religiosity levels is the ‘what’ and ‘who’. What are the differences; are they major or minor? Who are each of you; how flexible are each of you?
How being bullied affects dating.
July 7, 2022
No Comments
Bullying often leaves someone feeling insecure and unconfident – and this can show up in the dating. If you were a a victim of bullying.
How being bullied affects dating.
July 7, 2022
No Comments
The victim of bullying may find dating more difficult, and the one dating them will also be affected. There are two main effects of bullying: insecurity and unconfidence. Both impact dating.
When someone is insecure and lacking self-confidence, they keep their guard up; they are defensive and afraid to be vulnerable. They are afraid to trust others. This holds them back from sharing about themselves and building a relationship. They often lack the courage to make big steps, like getting into a relationship.
If your fears and anxieties are coming from events in your past, you must do everything possible to not let that harm your present and destroy your future.
If you see that you are struggling, it is important that you get input from someone with an understanding of effective dating. You may benefit from guidance from a dating coach or a wise shadchan.
Don’t get possessive.
January 26, 2022
No Comments
Some people have what is known as an “anxious attachment orientation”, which means that they hold on extra tight to the person they are attached
Why dating can begin well and become difficult later.
January 25, 2022
No Comments
Some people are great with dating until things turn serious. Once it becomes clear that things could go all the way with this person, a
A date can be both difficult and successful – there is no inherent contradiction.
January 25, 2022
No Comments
Ideally, you meet someone who is a great fit, you connect well with them, and are excited to have found someone with whom you can
I really care for her, so why can’t I feel that passionate love?
January 24, 2022
No Comments
You are dating someone you get along with great. You feel great affection towards him; but despite numerous dates, you do not seem to be
Know the difference between love and infatuation.
January 24, 2022
No Comments
Make sure that what you have is (the beginnings of) real love, not infatuation. Marriage is true long-term deal, so it is vital that your
I feel all he is interested in are my looks.
January 24, 2022
No Comments
Even if we consider ourselves good-looking and are proud of our appearance, we feel cheapened when other people are overly focused on our external appearance
Do you get stuck in the transition from “me” to “we”?
January 24, 2022
No Comments
This bothers her and plants seeds of doubt in her mind about whether she made the right choice. Being confronted by jarring feelings of self-doubt
I feel all he is interested in are my looks.
January 12, 2022
No Comments
Even if we consider ourselves good-looking and are proud of our appearance, we feel cheapened when other people are overly focused on our external appearance
English
Hebrew