The shidduch process can be mightily confusing. This “Navigate” section aims to make the process clearer and to help guide you through it.
We cover all things shadchan-related, as well as how to network broadly for dating suggestions. You will find here strategies and tips on conducting research, interacting with parents and mentors, preparing your shidduch profile, and how to cope with the difficult feelings of disappointment or rejection – and numerous other topics as well.
You may reprioritize on some things you thought were important, but always make sure your spouse has your essential requirements. Dropping the insistence on unimportant preferences is perfectly okay, but do not abandon your truest priorities because it will mean you don’t have to date anymore.
It would be easy to just say not to take it personally, but if only it were that simple. The urge for a romantic bond is deeply hard-wired into our brains. For this reason, some people experience rejection not merely as a (sometimes bitter) disappointment, but a very personal attack on their value as a human being. Here are key points to help you respond most constructively to this distressing feeling.
The core of dating is commencing a process through which you become increasingly absorbed in a single person. At the beginning of the process, you are understandably being selfish. However, for the dating process to achieve its purpose it must transition from a continual focus on your own interest to a growing attachment to the other person.
A girls meets a guy and is super excited about his date. This excitement remains at implausible levels for a few dates… until cracks appear in the image of perfection.
There are people who struggle with the very first dates. The communication skills for the first dates are different than most other communication; and some people find this difficult. These skills can be learned.
English
Hebrew