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What Are You Committing To? Some pointers for discussion
Some people treat dating only or mostly as a game, and seem resistant to developing a meaningful emotional...
Are you ready for marriage?
If you are not ready to get married, then you are not ready to date. Do not say that ‘I may as well start...
attracted - shorts
“I can’t help who I am attracted to"
More than the exact differences of your religiosity levels is the 'what' and 'who'. What are the differences;...
attracted to
“I can’t help who I am attracted to”
Some people may think they are attracted to only a certain look and won’t even consider dating someone...
attracted - article
“I can’t help who I am attracted to”
Attraction is a very personal thing. Clearly, there needs to be an attraction between two people for...
article (1)
How to be more interesting.
When you have an interesting life, you will have so much more to speak about, and you'll come across...
shorts
We have different religious levels, is this a problem?
More than the exact differences of your religiosity levels is the 'what' and 'who'. What are the differences;...
6
First deal with your psychological problems.
Marriage is the solution for many things, but it is not the solution to psychological problems. If you...
shorts 2
Pursue a meaningful life
When you show up on a date and you have a purposeful and meaningful existence, that resonates very strongly...
what is important
Know what is really important to marriage…
There are few hard and fast right and wrongs when it comes to romantic preferences. You not be able to...
58
What it means to be married – basics
What does it mean to be married, besides not being single? Successful dating leads to marriage, and marriage...
42
Knowing yourself, so that you know who to marry
Do you actually know what you are looking for? Your list of preferences is only useful if real thought...
29
I feel attraction to my own gender, can I get married?
If someone is asking this question, they are quite obviously facing a massive dilemma. We are addressing...
52
I am painfully quiet and find dating worrying and challenging.
Dating can leave some people feeling nervous, anxious, and worried. Remember that opening up to someone...
39
I am attracted to smart people, is that a problem?
Many people find something exhilarating about dating someone particularly smart. They find it easier...
36
How addiction to pornography could be affecting your dating.
Clearly, there are halachic, spiritual and psychological issues with pornography. Here we are looking...
31
Do I need therapy?
You are single and have been trying to get married for a while. Things are not going so well. You have...
41
“I did things in the past that I am now ashamed of; the guilt is eating me up.”
Guilt is a healthy response as a reaction to the past, yet it is a dysfunctional response to our posture...
Conflicting and confused priorities
Conflicting and confused priorities.
Without realizing it, some people are actually looking for opposites in a single person – which may explain...
own-gender
I feel attraction to my own gender, can I get married?
If someone is asking this question, they are quite obviously facing a massive dilemma. We are addressing...
looks-attractive
Are you fixated by appearance?
People often insist that the reason that they give such prominence to the physical attractiveness of...
painfully quiet and find dating worrying and challenging
I am painfully quiet and find dating worrying and challenging.
Dating can leave some people feeling nervous, anxious, and worried. Remember that opening up to someone...
can’t find someone with all the qualities
Why can’t I find someone with all the qualities I am looking for?
It is about the math. As soon as a person is looking for a quality or feature that is above-average –...
attracted to smart people
I am attracted to smart people, is that a problem?
Many people find something exhilarating about dating someone particularly smart. They find it easier...
How addiction to pornography
How addiction to pornography could be affecting your dating.
Clearly, there are halachic, spiritual and psychological issues with pornography. Here we are looking...
Why you may be perpetually dissatisfied
Are there actually two of you dating? Why you may be perpetually dissatisfied.
Some people find that whomever they date, they invariably find themselves dissatisfied. Nothing seems...
ashamed
“I did things in the past that I am now ashamed of; the guilt is eating me up.”
Guilt is a healthy response as a reaction to the past, yet it is a dysfunctional response to our posture...
need-therapy
Do I need therapy?
You are single and have been trying to get married for a while. Things are not going so well. You have...
attachment-relationship
What is “attachment” and why is this so important for romantic relationships?
Many of us are inclined to form adult relationships that are what psychologists call “poorly attached,”...
Deekras_10 illustrations_edited-11
Knowing yourself, so that you know who to marry
Do you actually know what you are looking for? Your list of preferences is only useful if real thought...
Preconditions-for-dating
Preconditions for dating
A person does not have to be perfect to date, but a person does need to be in a fit mental state. Developing...
medical condition
Finding out about a medical condition
If you are told that a potential shidduch has a medical condition, it is reasonable for you to be apprehensive....
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What it means to be married – the basics.
What does it mean to be married, besides not being single? Successful dating leads to marriage, and marriage...
4
Knowing yourself, so that you know who to marry.
The better you know yourself, the better prepared you are for dating and marriage.
3
The person has a psychological illness – should I consider it?
Understanding he difference between "psychological issues" and "psychological illness".
2
Are there actually two of you dating? Why you may be perpetually dissatisfied.
Why you may be perpetually dissatisfied.
dont like brother
So you don’t like her brother – get over it!
People use the expression “marrying into the family.” It is true that family is an important aspect of...
do you have anger issue
Do you have trouble controlling your anger?
You don’t have to be perfect to be married, but some behaviors are particularly damaging and should be...
30
Are you fixated by appearance?
People often insist that the reason that they give such prominence to the physical attractiveness of...
50
Conflicting and confused priorities.
Without realizing it, some people are actually looking for opposites in a single person – which...
let go unimportant
Let go of things that are unimportant.
If you are lucky enough to meet someone truly compatible with you, and with whom you are likely to be...
61
Does family really matter when it comes to a shidduch?
Put very simply, family matters a lot, but not as much as some other things. It is true that family is...
40
What is attachment? And why is it important?
What is attachment? Many of us are inclined to form adult relationships that are what psychologists call...
19
Best not to date if you are unable to give it the time and focus it deserves.
For a date to go well, you need to be present and focused. If you are over-tired, exhausted, or distracted,...
33
Preconditions for dating.
A person does not have to be perfect to date, but a person does need to be in a fit mental state. Developing...
51
Why can’t I find someone with all the qualities I am looking for?
It is about the math. As soon as a person is looking for a quality or feature that is above-average –...
33
What it means to be married – basics.
What does it mean to be married, besides not being single? Successful dating leads to marriage, and marriage...
10
Finding out about a medical condition
If you are told that a potential shidduch has a medical condition, it is reasonable for you to be apprehensive....
8
Preconditions for dating
For a dating to go well, you need to be present and focused. If you are over-tired, exhausted, or distracted,...
17
Knowing yourself, so that you know who to marry
People are often encouraged to make a list of criteria to guide the search process. Without question,...
does family really matter
Does family really matter when it comes to a shidduch?
You may marry “into” a family, but you are not marrying “the” family. People should be assessed on their...
34
Never settle for “second best”.
You may reprioritize on some things you thought were important, but always make sure your spouse has...
15
What is “attachment” and why is this so important for romantic relationships?
“Attachment” is a fascinating and complex matter, and the consequences are enormous for people’s experience...
6
Do I need therapy?
While therapy is designed to deal with traumas and wounds from the past, coaching is focused on helping...
psychological illness
The person has a psychological illness – should I consider it?
The question of whether to consider dating or marrying someone who has a psychological problem is one...
16
I did things in the past that I am now ashamed of; the guilt is eating me up.
Guilt is a healthy response as a reaction to the past, yet it is a dysfunctional response to our posture...
24
Are there actually two of you dating? Why you may be perpetually dissatisfied.
Every person's character is made of 'parts', generally these work well together. For some people, their...
29
Coping with disappointment in dating: The Rollercoaster syndrome.
A girls meets a guy and is super excited about his date. This excitement remains at implausible levels...
11
How addiction to pornography could be affecting your dating.
Needless to say, this is a highly sensitive topic. We discuss how dating and pursuit of marriage is likely...
14
I am attracted to smart people, is that a problem?
Many people find something exhilarating about dating someone particularly smart. They find it easier...
1
We have different religious levels, is this a problem?
More than the exact differences of your religiosity levels is the 'what' and 'who'. What are the differences;...
26
Why can’t I find someone with all the qualities I am looking for?
You are only looking for the one person – just one! – and you cannot find someone with all the qualities...
27
I am painfully quiet and find dating worrying and challenging.
Dating can leave some people feeling nervous, anxious, and worried. This impedes the dating process and...
22
Are you frightened by the difference of opinion?
In a marriage, there will be a healthy exchange of views and even differences of opinion. The unanimity...
5
Are you fixated by appearance?
When the physical appearance continually proves to be an obstacle, it is often the product of the person’s...
13
The Five Fundamentals – The factors most important to look for in a spouse.
When dating, it is so important to put most of your focus on “the fundamentals,” the absolutely most...
4
I feel attraction to my own gender, can I get married?
If someone has already indulged their same-sex interest even to a moderate degree, then this is by no...
25
Conflicting and confused priorities.
There are occasions when people have aspirations or expectations do not hold up to rational analysis...